474. "Pretty Tied Up" Guns N' Roses

"Pretty Tied Up"
Guns N' Roses
Use Your Illusion II
1991

I had a hidden shame as an alterna-kid in high school: I secretly loved Guns N' Roses. The perception seems to have changed a bit in the years since, but once "alternative" music took off, GnR were lumped in with Poison and Cinderella and the rest of the hair bands who were suddenly about as cool as Herb Alpert (Tijuana Brass, holla).
The Black Crowes (the other band who started the movement away from "image is everything" pop metal) got kind of screwed in the deal too, but fuck the Black Crowes.
The point is, when I scrawled the names of my favorite bands on my white hi-top Chucks in 11th grade, no way in Hades was I putting Guns N' Roses on there, even though I listened to them at least ten times as often as bands that did end up with the honor of an inscription on my smelly size tens and a halfs, like They Eat Their Own. Remember They Eat Their Own? Me neither.
I got through it. Yeah, it was tough when I heard people making fun of Shannon Hoon for being in the "Don't Cry" video, not being able to shout, "No, you're all wrong! Blind Melon is the band that sucks! Axl is the one that should be embarrassed!"
But I'm strong. Lived a hardscrabble life, made my way on the streets.
And eventually Axl came back and proved everyone wrong with Chinese Democracy, the album that sold 84 million copies worldwide, topped the Pazz and Jop poll and won 15 Grammys.
Wait, what?