439. "50ft. Queenie" PJ Harvey

"50ft. Queenie"
PJ Harvey
Rid of Me
1993

The path to full acceptance in society is a long and lonely one, replete with ignorance, and sometimes even violence.
Yet every subset of people that have to fight for equal rights has one person or one event that they can point to. African-Americans of course have Dr. Martin Luther King, Malcolm X, or any of the heroes of the civil rights movement. (Note to Hollywood: that did not include white people. Just stop.) Latinos revere Cesar Chavez. The gay rights movement can point to the Stonewall riots.
And dudes with small wieners have former Cowboys and Dolphins coach Jimmy Johnson.

NFL legend and "Survivor" also-ran Jimmy Johnson sold any shred of dignity he ever had courageously made himself the face of men who couldn't satisfy women by taking the fight to the airwaves as the spokesman for Extenze, which promotes itself as "natural male enhancement" for guys whose pecker doesn't wow the checker.
Daring the slings and arrows of those who would say that the product is an obvious ripoff and ploy to get the credit card numbers of those ashamed to admit that they must rely upon the motion of the ocean as the size of the boat is a mere dinghy, Johnson stood front and center, proudly, saying, "Follow me, men, and we will bear the disappointed looks from women together!"
A true American hero, Johnson will someday get his own monument in Washington, D.C. It won't be very large, but supporters will insist that's only because it's cold out.